Bloody Cursed Computer

So ‘The Legendary Computer’ once again has broken down. The connection is damn bloody weird. It is will totally not working in alternate days. I was thinking of watching this anime called ‘Paradise Kiss’ or see if Crunchyroll has this anime called ‘Blaue Rosen’… *Dirty thought streaming through my mind* Well you know the things I said about my aunt yesterday? Well I understand why she was so agitated. She was really angry with dad because he just left mum’s picture in that women’s car. Which mum would really hate. And she felt really painful that, yesterday it was mum’s last day and dad still treat it in a relax way. In fact, he even puts her picture in such a hateful position. So yar that was what she felt really angry. My dad had really angered my mum over the pass few years…. Causing her to get liver cancer over the pass few years. In fact she has depression. LOL My mum has depression and I have anger management problems. Well I think I really cool off a lot unlike when I was Primary 4 to 5. I don’t know why… I don’t get angry often when I was outside, but I get pissed easily at home. It is like I am against something. Well about my mum’s depression… Well she had it when our family went totally wrong. First is my dad, his job, money management, illness and…. rumored affairs. Second is me of course, I was really rebellious; I had anger management problems, and my TYPE of music and of course my studies. Well not that I say I am very bad nor I am very good. But my mum really expects a lot from me. The more her standards rise the more I get angry, the more I hurt her… Well I would say I am an average kid, or one who is trying to be an average kid. I don’t gang bang. I don’t take drugs. I don’t smoke. I don’t play truant. I don’t even skipped class. Yes, I do talk a lot in class. I do talk back. I do sleep or zone out in class. I do sometimes don’t homework. But other than that I am okok. My grades are average. Not the best, not the worse. I know she did not really like my class in Primary school. She was really angry that I landed in that class. But I must say without that class I would not learn what the worse is like. They were really nice people though. They are just all problematic. Like me. I was like them, they were like me. That year I finally felt that I was not the only one, there were others. But I guess it did not last long. I went to secondary school. Well I did make a few nice friends but not close enough. They don’t really like what I like, and a few of them are really scary people. They are like people with a mine bomb, the minute you say something wrong or do something wrong, they kind of explode. Weird people. Well never mind about that…. My mum also hates the music I listen to. She say they are people who take drugs, who do unmistakable things, and they are really dark people and worshipped the ‘wrong things’, their lyrics are very dark also. In fact their voice tone will not match my chorus voice. LOL. Well yeah it may kind of affect me in my voice color and articulation. But I never say I will make a living in the choral world. In fact I want to experiment with different genre of songs. And in fact visual kei really express me well. It is a genre that can express all kind of things anger, sorrow, happiness and best of all confusion. I mean which genre can express as well as visual kei. Rhythm and Blues only express love and lust no more. Have they ever talk about friendship about family? Pop genre… I think it is a very funny genre. It is a really commercialized but in the mind of a music person… it is a very shallow form of music. The lyric holds not much of a meaning. And I like Visual Kei song because the songs lift my spirit up, make me depressed… and so on. Like Alice nine and Miyavi and Kra make me happy while The GazettE and Plastic Tree make me depressed. Well that is all I can say. About My dad you know lar….. Hopeless Geezers